(Untitled)

clique

n : an exclusive circle of people with a common purpose

n.

A small exclusive group of friends or associates.

I hate cliques with a passion. I know I usually ended up in one from 7th to 11th grade but now that I'm a Sr. I hate them with a passion. Its just not cool to exclude other people. In fact its really immature.

The way I see it a clique consists of these main parts:

1. The Ringleader

This is the person who controls the entire group and holds the most power. Seen as the most popular or attractive, The group typically follows his/her every move. Gatherings are almost always at the ringleader's house.

2. Second in Command

The Best friend too the Ringleader. Like the vice president he/she fills in where needed. Holds the second most power.

3. The Suck-ups

Their only purpose is to kiss up as much as possible. The ONLY REASON why they are third, power wise is because the ringleaders think they are perfect little angels who could do no harm when the truth is they are secretly out to overthrow the leader.Sad Sad people.

4. Wanna be's

These are the rest of the people in the clique. They prance around admiring the ringleader.Consisting of the "funny one", the "Arty one", the "sporty one", or whatever other label you can slap on them.

When it comes down to it they think they're better then everyone else. They are usually tightly knit and don't let "outsiders" in very easily. It sucks. Its not nice to other people and I'm ashamed that I was ever in one. I never want to exclude anyone from anything EVER.

***************

Its been a bad night. If you know me then you know that I am constantly smiling or laughing about something but that's not the case tonight. Do you ever feel like your invisible, like no one really notices whether or not you're there? I hate that feeling. Usually I just shake it by thinking all the funny things that happened that day or about Katelyn O'Connor saying "Because I'm not a jerk!" (lol!) but there comes a point when a person can smile no longer. I don't feel like being all happy and ditzy today or tomorrow. I don't think people even notice that I do that to make a positive impact on them. Tomorrow I don't think I'll smile and see if anyone notices. Chances are they won't because they haven't before but whatever.

I feel very....forsaken (is that the right word?). Like no one cares whether or not I laugh at the hard stuff and try to be positive. I don't know. Its late and I'm sure I'm only saying this because I'm so tired. i'll be back to my bubble-ly self soon enough. No worries!

Because I'm not a jerk...

Pitty Whore - One who whores for pitty (lol). You know those people who go around fishing for compliments by saying things like "I'm ugly, I'm stupid, I'm fat!" yeah those people are what I like to call pitty whores because they know good and gosh darn well that they are not these things that they call themselves. I can't stand those types of people!! THEY KNOW that they look good and yet they still complain! Grrr...arg. Feel free to use my phrase for your friends or co-works.

*

Today was pretty nice. I got to wear my Nightmare Before Christmas jacket which I bought at the wonderful Hot Topic store in the mall. My art teacher thought it was "freaky weird" that I was wearing it. Well you know what, she's a bit weird herself. While I was at Hot Topic I found the Fight Club pin that was stolen from me. That is I found another copy of the exact same pin. Fight Club is the most awesome Brad Pitt movie ever. I want to make a whole bunch of pins that just have Fight Club quotes on them. Some of my favorite include....

"I wasn't really dying, I wasn't host

to cancer or parasites; I was the

warm little center that the life of

this world crowded around."

~Narrator~

"I wanted to destroy something beautiful."

~Narrator~

Narrator: When you have insomnia, you're never really asleep... and you're never really awake.

Narrator: This is your life and it's ending one minute at a time.

*

I've almost finished writing my paper on my friend Liz from Joplin (hey Liz!!!) I plan on posting a link to it as soon as its all done. To sum it all up..."Don't judge people by the way they dress. Stereotying someone because they dress Goth is not cool." (lol) I think she was really flattered to hear that she made such an impact on my life. I'm so happy I could bring her some sunshine!

I'm going to buy a button maker darn it!! I need to make some buttons for the people who sit with me in art. They're going to say "...because I'm not a jerk". Hehehe that's Katelyn slogan for the rest of the year. I also want to make a whole bunch of pins for my friends (hey that rhymes).

Random note: We don't have school on friday!! WHOOPEE!!!

So my best friends boyfriend smacked another girl (that he's lusting over) on the butt. HOW NOT OK IS THAT?????!!! Then, ohh it gets better, he tells my best friend that he's lusting over her foreign exacange/roommate and using her drama friend for eye candy. Then he claims that he feels bad about doing so. COME ON! Who tells their girlfriend that? STUPID STUPID MAN!!! All of this happening on her birthday weekend!

I've changed! hotsaucejane.diaryland.com check it out!

Who loves Orange soda?

Charlee posted (a few days ago) that she was upset about our school's See You At The Pole tradition (where twice a year, christians get together at the flag pole and pray) because she's a buddhist and she thinks that SHE wouldn't be aloud to celebrate her religion. Sorry Charlee but that's bull. You could go around school doing all your chants and no one would care but one christian praying sends up a red flag. WE NEVER ARE ALOUD TO PRAY EVEN NEAR SCHOOL!! I honestly think that you need to release this anger that you have tword S.Y.A.T.P. Its only twice a year so just relax!

In other news I went to work sick on sat. and sun. I think people noticed.....hmmm oh well. I really needed the hours. I can only pray that they don't make me work on Friday (Ashley's Birthday).

Yesterday I got a whole case of orange soda....mmmmmmm orange soda.

Kel: "Who loves Orange soda, Kel loves orange soda, is it true, mmhhhhuuuhh I do I do I doo oooh."

I miss Lawrence, Ks. I miss it bad. Even though the people there treated me like crap and ruined my life forever, I still want to go back. There is just something about the town that will always be home to me. I wrote an essay about it last week. We were assigned to write a descriptive essay and I decided that describing the last time I saw my room was what would make me happiest.

Has anyone seen my nose?

My nose has run off...if found please return to me...here....thanks.

I honestly think that going to Kickapoo is going to kill me (one day at a time). I walked into the school this morning and snot just started dripping out my nose. It was so nasty. The entire day I was sniffing (it was so funny because people thought I was crying lol).

Yesterday I had a total mental break down at the end of Portfolio. When the bell rang I just sat in my seat crying because I want to have all this talent that I clearly don't have. I was looking at some of my old work and I for some reason its better then my new stuff. I'm working on this new color pencil piece that could finally get me out of my slump (that is if God will help me). I feel like one of those ducks covered with spilt oil that you see on TV. I try and flap my wings and all I get is caught in the oil.

Anyway, I hope that I don't have to work on my friend's birthday. Which is totally going to rock. I guess we're doing a mystery dinner party and one of us "dies" and we have to figure out how commited the murder.

I fear that I won't get the day off because I've asked for Halloween and Thanksgiving off. I put in the "ask off book" that I was willing to work Christmas and Christmas Eve (which is a BIGGGGGGG deal in my family). I hope I don't get disowned.

Song of the moment: For no real reason I find myself listening to "Tempted" by Squeeze. Its a good song what can I say? I like oldies.

ARGHHGHGHGH!!!

Petty petty people! I can't stand people who can sit around and pick out every little detail about someone and complain about it! And please tell me, how is it possible that "laughing alot" can be a bad thing? Seriously? I'm sorry but I don't focus on the bad things on life. Today, some girl in class made fun of my skirt and you know what I did? I FORGOT ABOUT IT AND WENT ON WITH MY LIFE!! Geeze people.

I maybe over generalizing but CHRISTIANs ARE HAPPY, POSITIVE, people. Christians realize that everyone has their faults but not to obsess on them. I guess what I'm trying to say is that you may think you want to be friends with people but then you meet them...and they suck. My advice today is "get right with God so you can get right with yourself".

I'll do it EEEEEEE-bay!

Its week two on the Artist's Block. I can't draw anything!! I am so upset about this. I want to prove to Bylander that I'm a good artist but I can't do that if I keep making crap like the thing I did today!! I feel so ashamed to be sitting next to Krystin and Katelyn and even what's her name (I know her name but its on the tip of my tounge). I need some serious help. Right after I finish posting I'm going to whip out my sketch book and start drawing until my fingers go numb.

I HAVE DISCOVED GLORIOUS (spelled right???) EBAY!!! That place is amazing. Without it I would have never found this kick @ss Trainspotting shirt! I am so excited!

They told me to update....

I'll admit it...I'm a lazy bum who doesn't update. "If you wait...she shall post...."


I've finally gotten around to updating this thing (sorry by the way). Its been really crazy around here. Between spending quality time with the "parental units" and trying to help Ashley show Sweedish girl around town, I've had NO TIME!!! Not to mention I have to work (some of us can't skip out on our shifts like others can). I can promise that once school starts, that I'll update atleast once a week.



So 6 people are going to [quit/quit already] at my work which not only sucks because we have to train more people but because there is always that horrid chance that one of my friends gets hired. Now don't get my wrong, I love all my friends but I think that it would be a really bad sit. for everyone because well...working with friends whom you see all the time causes you to get really annoyed with them. That's why I didn't work with my best friend at the Palace (theater). I could just see us throwing the popcorn at each other and screaming "I HATE YOU!!" "I HATE YOU TOO!!" and then hugging and crying the next min. "I didn't mean what I said. You're my best friend. ::sniff sniff::".

See L-Dub is down 'wit dat'

Sophmore year I was sitting in history class next to one of my good friends at the time, and we were looking at books on famous people from around the world when I leaned over and said, jokingly "I wonder why all artists are crazy psychos who end up being famous only AFTER they die." Then she responded coldly "I don't know why Laura. You're an artist why don't you tell me." I was stunned and all I could do is sit, looking at her with my mouth wide open.

I don't know why that came to mind but it did today. Funny...I smile when I think of that because the comment was so STUPID THAT SHE MADE TO ME!!!

Anyway I'm in portfolio class, trying to draw this colouge when I realize that I can't draw anymore. Here I am in this advanced class, surrounded by all these people who are KNOWN in my school as these excellent and I can't even draw a simple picture of this asian girl in a kimono. I felt so..icky. I know, or atleast I think I do, that I can draw well but is that good enough? ARG!! I hate doubting myself. Its just that...these girls in my class are so FREAKIN' GOOOD at drawing.

On a lighter note: my friend Ashley is Prez of Drama club so I get to help her out with all the fun stuff we do in there. I'm even going the 'hoody' design for her. All of us are going to have nicknames on the back. Mine will be one of the following..

LoLo

Velma

L-Dub it has to do with my last name begining with W.

Chip

I can't decide....ooo all of them are soooo good!!

How much is lunch??

YAAA, school started and the heat index is super high!!!! I can't believe that the summer is already over. Why GOD???WHY??????

I'm so used to being able to get up late that when I almost didn't get up at all this morning. Thank goodness I have a mother who enjoys waking me up early, even if it is 30 mins earlier then I asked her to wake me up at.

I'm pretty much enjoying my classes except for Grammer and Comp, which requires me to write a paper each week and tons of homework. I already have homework in there. I guess I have to write a 'letter' to the teacher explaining what I plan to accomplish in her class.

I think Portfolio class is going to be my fav class but I haven't decided if I'm going to take the AP test or not. My only fear is that when they rate my portfolio that I'll get a 1 or a 0 which would really suck (the highest is a 5).

Lunch really sucked today. Of course all the freshmen had no idea how to pay for their food (geeeeze just scan your id tag genius) so I ended up waiting in line for 20 mins. Lol then I remembered that we got out of school at 12:50 so I was like "Heck with that I'll eat at home!!!". Its pretty sad that the food at home is better then at school. I mean....considering its the food at MY house.

Finally saw Tamila...the convo was going good until SOMEONE showed up and made some kind of stupid remark about me which he thought that I would think was funny. Grrr.

donde están...

::yawn:: that was a very nice 12 hour shift that I had today. I really can't complain though because I basicly volunteered for it. See...everyone in town decided that they had nothing better to do then go to the movies. Not new movies...(oh no that would be unheard of)....but ones that have been out for several weeks!!! Unfortunately we didn't expect this to happen so we were extremely understaffed. I felt so bad when they mentioned that no one could come in (those lazy bums!) so I said that I'd be willing to stay and help clean theaters. What can I say? I like to help out! A little extra pay can't hurt either.


So I was checking my messages today and Tamila called..yeah, it took her 2 months but she finally called. Anyway she's in Rogersville. Why? I DON'T KNOW!! I tried to get a hold of her but some weird guy answered the phone and told me that she had left to go see a movie with her mother (which obviously wasn't at the theater that I work at because I didn't see her and I was there most of the day/night). I really need to talk to her!!! A person can only go so long without talking to their best friend before their head explodes. Man, she's going to think its so funny that Natalie is working at SnoBiz ,able to give handouts to her friends, and Tamila isn't even here to get any!! HAHA that's what she gets!! [Long story; don't ask.]


I bought Windows XP yesterday hoping that it would help my computer run smoother. Well....5 mins after it was installed an error message poped up!! How crazy is that? I yelled so loud that the dogs freaked out and ran away. They'll be ok.


So I have this evvvvil plan to totally get Ashley back for covering her friends' cars with crap....cover her car with crap. Hehehe although when I do it, her car will turn out to be a work of art. The girl never puts her car in the garage!! She's basicly asking for it to be messed with! So I'm going to go out and get that window chalk and write stuff like "...because friends trash their friends' cars" and "Ozark, Ozark Mountain Ducks ::swoosh::" and "ohhhh...donde están mis padres". All VERY funny inside jokes. VERY FUNNY . Ok so they aren't that funny. Then I'm going to totally cover her car in T.P. She's going to love it! Oh yeah and take a picture and put it in her birthday card. Its just a good thing she never reads my web site or else my plans would be ruined.


And when she realizes that it was I, Laura, master of getting people back, there is nothing she can do because I put my car in the garage every single night and I would catch her if she ever tried it at my work.


Yep, I am ready to fall into bed and have happy little dreams about Ewan McGregor.

Ewan McGregor deserves an Oscar

"I've got a black woolen hat and it's got PERVERT written across the front of it. It's the name of the clothing label. And I was with my wife and my baby at the supermarket and I didn't think. I just put my hat on Clara's head, because it was cold. And the looks. I couldn't figure out why I was getting death looks. And then I realized my 10-month old baby's wearing a hat with the word pervert written on it and these people were like, 'There's Satan! There's Satan out with his kid!' And then I made a point of her wearing it every time we went there."

- Ewan, on an experience during filming A Life Less Ordinary in Denver, Colorado; Buzz Magazine March 1997

Tree-Hugging Hippie

Prepare yourself for a rant.... Having a gun collection is so stupid...why would you EVER need 7 guns... please tell me why. SO THAT YOU CAN GO OUT AND KILL BAMBIE'S MOTHER???!!! What kind of sick person does that..oh wait...yeah that's who. Why do I bring this up you ask? Because Megan and I were talking about it/him/that person and its on my mind and..and...and...that bugs me. It bugs her too! I mean, with 7 guns you are just asking to be called a hick.


AND SO WHAT if I'm a tree hugging hippie. There is nothing wrong with that. Hugging tress is fun. I love trees and I think that we should save them (don't you think so too?). That doesn't mean I'm going to go out and place my self infront of a bulldozer but it does mean that I try and recycle whenever possible so that my children will live in a cleaner, happier world.


And why...why would you just walk up to me and throw my keys on the ground...why? What is the point in that? Do you NOT want me to leave? Do you really want to see me pick them up? Come on!


That was my rant for the day. I will soon post something new. ps The quote "People who talk in metaphors outta shampoo my crotch." is mildly funny but not something that I would repeat over and over and over.

He who keeps Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep

"Therefore I tell you do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more inportant that food, and the body more important that clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more caluable then they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life." (Matthew 6:25-27)


I have realized that worrying takes up too much of my life. I should be spending time enjoying now and not worrying about the future.I've come to see that I have not been trusting in God as much as I should be and I am ashamed of that cold fact.

While driving home from work, instead of being happy that I've gotten a chance to spend time with such great people I am worring about what kind of impression I left them with or how things will go tomorrow (Did I say all the right things today? Do they think I'm weird? Was I secretly written up and not told? What if I'm late to work tomorrow because I don't have enough gas?).

Its COMPLETELY STUPID that I do that!!! I should be singing along to my favorite Beatles lyrics but instead I'm creating little wrinkles in my forehead! But you know what? I'm through with it! All this time I have claimed to be Christian and yet I cannot even trust God enough to give him my worries?? What's up with that? I am changing that all right now. I am putting my worries into God's hands and trusting him.


"And why do your worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like of onf these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, whis is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not be much more clothe you, o you of little faith? So do not worrym saying ' What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you eed them. But seek first his kingdon and his righteousness and all these thing will be given toyou as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own" (Matthew 6:28-34)

Huh? What? Oh I'm sorry I wasn't listening....

I've realized that working at the movie theater has made me somewhat of a vampire in the sense that I'm starting to have problems with sunlight. Today I went to go return a DVD (Shanghi Knights- DON'T SEE IT!) and the sun almost blinded me!! It was so sad. I had to walk around all day in my sun glasses, even when I was indoors, and its all beacuse they've been working me nights. Its bad enough that one of my managers looks like Angel from...well Angel, but now I'M becoming sensitive to light??? What's up with that?


So yeah, I closed the other night and let me tell you that is not fun. I never realized that mopping could take so much out of you. At the end of the night I was sweating like crazy but atleast the backroom was somewhat cleaner. On a side note:I told that one manager that he looked like David Boreanaz and he sort of freaked out and was like "I get that all the time but I have no idea who he is". Then...Laura being the "don't think just say" type I said "Wow really? I was totally obsessed with him a year or so ago". (Don't ever say that to your magager...it causes this horrible silence that can never be broken) Then I tried to recover by quickly saying "he's not that attractive anymore though". ONCE AGAING STUPID THING TO SAY!!! He responded with "What are you tying to say Laura" (but he was laughing when he said it so its all good). I'm sure he thought nothing of it. I'm pretty sure. Anyway, I just try to remember to never mention this to him.


Too....many....AIM....convos....going...on...... must...end...one....


I had this horrible dream last night that I got a ticket for running a red light and my license got taken away. I woke up screaming. Why did I have this dream you ask? Because Tanner HAD to tell me a story about how he knows all these people who have had their licenses taken away and how horrible it was for them. DARN YOU TANNER!!!

::God save the weak::

::God save the weak::
So I was at Journalism camp last week and looking through magazines when I found this article called "Why Aren't You Listening, God?" It was basicly about this girl who was being made fun of because she had glasses so she prayed to God every night that he would make her sight better (yeah I thought that was stupid too). After years and years of no answer she got upset and started to lose faith. As she put it in the article " God knew my real need. I did need a repair but not on my eyes but on my heart". She soon saw that God was answering her prayer. He was making her look deep inside herself for what she really wanted, an emotional healing. I advise that everyone try and read this article. Its in Campus Life , the June/July issue of this year.


The BIGGEST petpeeve I have are those who are weak in faith. I don't care what you believe but believe in it. Don't chose a faith because its the latest fad or because it sounds cool, chose it because its what's going to make your life better. I am a christian because I know in my heart that no other religion would fit me. Sorry, but buddah just won't work for me. See God and I are cool. "I call him G-dog and he calls me Lolo". It just works like that. If you can find that kind of relationship God then you're set.

:: a change would do you good::

:: a change would do you good::
as you can see I've changed the page around a bit. I haven't gotten the new site ready yet so stuff is going to be posted here for a while. I also think I have broken my thumb. Hmmm maybe the swelling will go down in a few days. See at camp a few of us decided to play pool w/o the pool sticks and that was...uh dumb. Somehow my thumb got suck between the 8 ball and the 5 ball. It was pretty painful but I got over it. Now its this pretty purple. Maybe thats a good thing.

I haven't talked to my Best Friend Tamila in a while. I called up Matt (her debate partner) and he said that she's in Az. for the rest of the summer. My fear is that her family is going to make her stay there and I'll never get to say goodbye to her. I feel really bad that we haven't been hanging out at all. I have faith that she's going to call me and give me the low-down on what her living sit. is. Last time I talked to her she mentioned something about them moving back here so that she could finish highschool. I know her and her boyfriend have a pretty close relationship (hehehe 'inside joke' nothing bad) so I can't see her leaving without putting up a fight.

Work is going good. A few weeks ago they decided to finally put me in box. Sure it sucked the first day but when I worked it last night it was great!!! I feel really confident about what I'm doing now. Not only am I working box but I'm also going to get 2 free frappuccinos. One of my managers told me that if I sold 30 large drinks he'd buy me one and obviously I did (33 to be exact). You'd be suprised how hard it is to get people to buy large drinks! At one point I was trying to convince people that it would save their relationship with their significant other ("You know, if you get a large drink you wouldn't have to fight over who gets the last sip because there is SOOOO much that its highly unlikely that you'll finish it before the movie is over") I can't believe that worked.

Then last night I stayed and extra 2 hours to help out with the 'Pirates' rush which earned me another frappuccino. I love it when managers bribe you with caffeine.

At one point we had to make the line go out the door because of a fire hazard so Blair starts shouting "If you have tickets and are waiting to be seated we need to start making the line go out the door." and some lady turned around and screamed at her "EXCUSE ME BUT ITS HOT OUTSIDE AND SOME OF US DON'T WANT TO BE IN THAT KIND OF HEAT!" It was so funny. I thought Blair was going to turn around and smack her or something but she kept her cool. I was impressed.


song of the moment: My Sharona- by The Knack

The ONLY reason I picked this song is because we have this promo DVD that plays the trailer for Charle's Angels 2 with that stupid song on it. I SWARE IF I HEAR THAT SONG ONE MORE TIME.....arg! Yesterday I kept singing the lyrics over and over which I'm sure scared the customers (they kept giving me weird looks but that could have been because I'm weird).

OOOO....new blogger...SWEETNESS!!!

And then I said...

Look...I'm having some problems remembering to post on Diaryland so just in case check http://hotsaucejane.blogspot.com/

to see if I've said anything new.


I just got home from taking Megan to the movies. Once again my car was flatter by her compliments (inside joke). That girl lives too damn far away from the theater!!! Then again, this is coming from the girl that lives in the middle of no-where.


::Yawn:: LXG was...not as exciting as I would have hoped (well boo!) but atleast I was able to finally see it. Bad Boys II was SOOO much better. That opinion may be bias though. I think Will Smith is a hottie and any movie he's in is awesome. ::drool:: Will Smith ::drool::


I would post more but my mind just doesn't work very vell (did I just type "vell"???!!! I mean "well". Gee Wiz I need sleep!)at 12:40 am. I wonder why?

Well I think its time for me to change places....so here's the new address to the new Blog CLICK HERE . I'm sick of trying to get the stupid template to work....anyway....updates are there