My work hired a bunch of new people and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing. My fear is that I'm going to begin to separate people into sections (newbies, stick-it-outies, and oldies). That would suck and be horribly mean/unfair. I just found out tonight that one of my fav. co-workers is quitting. I am highly upset. She totally rocks. I understand why though, she is clearly stressed out with work and school. Maybe she'll come back later in the school year.
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Do you ever feel like something is going on that no one is telling you about? Yeah, I got that feeling today. I walked into the office and two of my managers were talking about this one girl who apparently bats her eyes. They weren't really making fun of her; in fact, one manager was like "Oh I just love her!" At one point one of them said to the other "OO that remind me...I have to tell you something". Then it got all quiet. I think that was a signal for me to leave. It wasn't like I wasn't doing anything though, I was clearly bagging tickets. So before I left I giggled and said something like "Okie dokie, I'm going to leave so that you all can talk secretly" and they laughed with me. I am way too paranoid. Honestly, I doubt that they all sit around a big table and talk about me!! It's just that sometimes I hear things from my co-workers...Not negative things but things. I worry. I KNOW I'M LOVED I'M JUST PARANOID!!!
I was reading Kristen's journal and it reminded me of how much I miss my OLD group of friends. Sure we weren't as "smart as her friends as MSA" were (apparently) but we were SMART! Man, Natalie and Linzy were so much fun to hang out with. I remember the LONG discussions we would have (at the PARTY house A.K.A Natalie's house) late at night about God or the meaning of life. That was so great. I also remember the crap that tore our little group apart!! STUPID STUPID RUMORS!! I hated being associated with a certain person's opinion. I had my own opinions!! I WAS MY OWN PERSON!!! I didn't hate Natalie! I had no problem with her. Then crap happened...and more crap happened...and then even more crap happened. It sucked. Then Natalie thought I was this evil person which sucked (and I'm sure she had a right to think so because I was somewhat evil to her thanks to the lies I had been told). Anyway, I missed the GOOD TIMES.
I have this beautiful Beatle's song in my head.
Words are flying out like
endless rain into a paper cup
They slither while they pass
They slip away across the universe
Pools of sorrow waves of joy
are drifting thorough my open mind
Possessing and caressing me
Jai guru deva om
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Nothing's gonna change my world
Images of broken light which
dance before me like a million eyes
That call me on and on across the universe
Thoughts meander like a
restless wind inside a letter box
they tumble blindly as
they make their way across the universe
I love it because it just gives me such a relaxed feeling. It's beautiful. I'm weird like that.
PS. I lied on Kristen's Journal Commenting system thingy. As Alison put it "and that whole Marxists joke, seriously I got it, but it wasn't funny". My toes are stepped on. Owie.
