It's always cloudy when you look into the past

iTunes: The Take Over, Break's Over by Fallout Boy
I am: bored out of my mind

I am not apologizing for listening to Fallout boy. I like their music and I could care less if everyone thinks they're douchebags.

My trip to see my sister is over and I regret not staying longer. I only get to see her approximately twice a year (Christmas and maybe Thanksgiving) so you can only image how exited I was to have this little trip to see her. I am going to see if I can make plans to come and see her over Spring Break or something. I'm sure she's glad to finally have me out of her hair. I ate a significant amount of her Easy Mac and Snicker Bars. I think I'm going to order some and send them to her as a thank you.

I am one of those people who, when I walk into a restaurant I pick the strangest thing on the menu and try it. This amazed my sister. Fried oysters, Corn Nuggets, Squid Sushi, Japansese Pickle Sushi, among other various things are what I have tried on this trip. I forced my sister to try all these things as well. It worked out about 80% of the time. The Squid Sushi was.....rubbery and not that good and the Pickle Sushi was good but not very flavorful. The Corn Nuggets were AMAZING and my sister is in love with the Fried Oysters.

I should have brought my copy of Julius Caesar but unfortunately I brought Chuck Palahniuk's Haunted. Reading the first few chapters of that book has been a very traumatic experience for me. It is a rare occasion that I actually want to THROW AWAY or even GIVE AWAY a book I had bought for myself but I do not think I can finish this book. Things getting stuck in sexual organs, people biting through their own large intestines, ripping a child from a mother's womb and stewing it and feeding it to her, people eating their own extremities, assassination through the art of foot massage, I could go on and on. It's just too much. Mr. Palahniuk is a wonderful writer but I just can't stomach it.

It appears that my once beautiful tan has faded and I am back to my disgusting pastiness.

This is what happens in Atlanta

This being the first time I had ridden a plane by myself, one can only imagine who stressed I was. There was always the fear of my plane being delayed or even worse, the gate changing at the last moment. So as I sat in the Atlanta airport for four hours I gave myself an ulcer worrying about the weather getting progressively worse. Thankfully the clouds disappeared and I was able to fly out on time.

I was able to take this shot while I waited those amazing four hours.

11:30am in the Atlanta Airport

He is wearing a Goosebumps t-shirt; authentically vintage. He reminds me of a past crush. It’s the way his hair is cut, it’s the way he crosses his legs, it's the awkward way he sits there and it’s his plaid green shorts. His slight 5 o’clock shadow brings attention to his defined jaw line. He is eating. He is eating Burger King of all things. I hope he is on my flight. I imagine the awkwardness that might ensue if he has the seat next to me. Will I stare at him? Will we make small talk? I remember a line from Pulp Fiction that refers small talk.

He has a macbook and a guitar case.

I hope we randomly meet in Gulfport. Maybe we will bump into each other while fishing for our suitcases at baggage claim. Maybe we will awkwardly make eye contact and smile in that way that reminds me of indie romance flicks.

Life should be like a Jane Austen Novel

Elizabeth was much too embarrassed to say a word. After a short pause, her companion added, “You are too generous to trifle with me. If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject forever.” Elizabeth feeling all the more than common awkwardness and anxiety of his situation, now forced herself to speak; and immediately, though not very fluently, gave him to understand, that her sentiments had undergone so material a change, since the period to which he alluded, as to make her receive with gratitude and pleasure, his present assurances.

Suffocating Cloud

Suffocating Cloud
Originally uploaded by HotsauceJane.

A storm is coming. I can feel it.

I think I'm going to puke.

Looks like I'm not the only one who doesn't update

Postsecret has skipped it's Sunday update. Frank enabled comments this week and it looks like the general public is upset that they haven't gotten their weekly dose of other people's secrets. It's actually quite funny.

Photographs and memories

There is nothing more delightful to me than going through old family photo albums. A few days ago my dad pulled down about 6 boxes from the attic, all filled with albums. It was like Christmas came early.

Dear Angry Nitpicky Grossly Emo Rage-a-holic,

Oh my goodness you have a problem! Someone needs to take a chill pill and quick. What I have seen of you the past month or so has made me fearful of your future. I don't think I've ever met anyone who has such a rage problem as you. I have yet to spend an hour with you, without you flipping out over one thing or another. What scares me the most is that your anger is explosive; it comes in unforeseen bouts. I'm seriously concerned about being around you. You remember that Alanis Morissette song "You Oughta Know"? You remember how hostile that song is? I'm convinced that you wrote that song. It reeks of your whiny, vindictive tone.

Here's the underlined issue; it's hard for me to trust you when I never know when you're going to turn on me and go on some rant about how I did or didn't do some little thing that annoys you. I know about your little discussions that you have had with others in the past few weeks. I'm aware of your random fits animosity. What's funny is that I find this behavior more pitiful than anything. True, I could get all pissy about all the things you've said and done but I feel more sorrow for your life more than anything.

It will hurt when you hit rock bottom

It bothers me that I am losing respect for you. I know it is only a matter of weeks, if not days that I won't even know who you are any more.

iTunes: "Leave me Alone" by Michael Jackson

Geeze what is today, some kind of "Let's Dog on Laura Day"? Hold on, let me check iCal... National Brother's Day, International Tiara Day, National Escargot Day....nope nothing.

That mythology class is paying off

Did you know that Medea is often referred to as "The Tigress" because when her husband Jason decided to leave her for a younger woman, Glauce, she killed Glauce, her father, and most importantly the children that Medea had with Jason? That's right; she killed her own children.

You learn something new every day.

Sway

"I wonder about the trees.
Why do we wish to bear
Forever the noise of these
More than another noise
So close to our dwelling place?
We suffer them by the day
Till we lose all measure of pace,
And fixity in our joys,
And acquire a listening air.
They are that that talks of going
But never gets away;
And that talks no less for knowing,
As it grows wiser and older,
That now it means to stay.
My feet tug at the floor
And my head sways to my shoulder
Sometimes when I watch trees sway,
From the window or the door.
I shall set forth for somewhere,
I shall make the reckless choice
Some day when they are in voice
And tossing so as to scare
The white clouds over them on.
I shall have less to say,
But I shall be gone."

The Sound of the Trees by Robert Frost

Selected Songs from various playlists on my iPod...

Emo Song:
Paper Bag by Fiona Apple

Happy-Sappy Song:
Shimmy Shimmy Quater Turn- Hellogoodbye

Guitar Hero Song:
Crazy On You- Heart

Sweet Lovin' Song:
Here In My Room- Incubus

Party like it's 1990 Song:
Mr. Jones- Counting Crows

The Joggin Mix Song:
Dragula- Rob Zombie

Photography Inspiration Song:
First Snow- Composed by Clint Mansell

Sleepy Time Song:
Complainte De la Butte- Rufus Wainwright

Muse Song:
Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want- Muse

Me do good, me do good photo?

Today I stumbled upon a set of engagement photos for some people that I know. I wouldn't call them my friends...we don't really hang out, but I have known them for quite some time, and they know me. As I was flipping through this set of photos a wicked self centered, egotistical thought crossed my mind. I actually said to myself, "Wow. I could have taken better photos then these." I immediately realized what I said and reprimanded...myself. But why? Why should I apologize for acknowledging that I am a good photographer: that my portraits are full of life and have a less cliche feel to them? I'm sorry but there are a lot of crappy photographers around who think that posed pictures are "shizknat". Last year I took some engagement photos for my good friends Jarrod and Sarah (to the left) and I couldn't have been more please with the results. Granted, I did have a few shots that we not up to par, but that's why I took 3 rolls!! THAT'S WHAT YOU DO!! You take tons of photos so you can weed out the crappy ones. I promised myself that I would never become one of those pretentious photographers who thinks that they're the best of the best and I don't. I KNOW there are some really fantastic photographers in town who are MUCH better than me. BUT...there are also a crap ton of photographers in town who are much less talented than me and it pisses me off that they are getting paid...more than me....to take crappy shots.

Marriage Day

I feel completely terrible because I missed probably one of the most awesome wedding in the entire world. "Why?" you ask? Let me explain in ghetto style:

I am so poor I use cheerios as earrings!
I am so poor that I chase the garbage truck with a shopping list!
I am so poor I can't even to pay attention!
I am so poor that I eat cereal with a fork to save milk!
I am so poor that burglars break into my home and leave money!
I am so poor that I watch television on an Etch-A-Sketch!
I am so poor that even the Republicans were willing to give me welfare!

I'm guessing that you get the gist of what I'm sayin' here. The wedding was out of state and would have required me to go 3 days without work and I would have had to pay for food and a hotel room. Things are a bit tight right now and I just didn't have the money to go. I even attempted to budget for it but in the end I had to use that budgeted money for my insurance bill. It sucks because I bet it was the most awesome wedding ever. Blah! So Mr. and Mrs. Sonner if you are reading this I am terribly sorry that I did not attend your wedding. I hope you had a fantastic "Marriage Day!"

iPod, therefore I AM

Put your iPod on shuffle and go down the list to answer the questions.

How am I feeling today?
Coffee and TV- Blur

How will I feel tomorrow?
Rockafeller Skank- Fatboy Slim

Daaang right

Will I get far in life?
The Poison- Alkaline Trio

How do my friends see me?
Roadhouse Blues (Live)- The Doors

Where will I get married?
The Lonely Man/Incredible Hulk Theme- Composed by Joe Harnell

What is my best friend's theme song?
Have You Ever- Incubus

What is the story of my life?
Here By Me- 3 Doors Down

What was high school like?
Times Like These- Foo Fighters

How can I get ahead in life?
Candy Perfume Girl- Madonna

What is the best thing about me?
Spice Up Your Life- Spice Girls

Side note: Look....I know I shouldn't have the Spice Girls even CLOSE to my iPod...but well...I love 90's pop.

How is today going to be?
One Angry Dward and 200 Solemn Faces

What is in store for this weekend?
Right Where I belong- 3 Doors Down

What song describes my parents?
Burn- Three Days Grace

What song describes my grandparents?
Classical Gas- Eric Calpton

How is my life going?
Favorite Things- Incubus

What song will they play at my funeral?
With A Little Help from My Friends- Joe Crocker

Some of these answers are a bit eerie.

How does the world see me?
Shrinking Universe-Muse

Will I have a happy life?
All This Love- The Similou

What do my friends really think of me?
Downfall- Trust Company

Do people secretly lust after me?
Ex-Girlfriend- No Doubt

How can I make myself happy?
The Delicate Place- Spoon

ROFL!

What should I do with my life?
Old Friends/Bookends- Simon & Garfunkel

Will I ever have children?
The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly- Blues Traveler

What is some good advice for me?
Fair- Remy Zero

How will I be remembered?
Cry to You- Cadet

What is my signature dancing song?
Death Is A Disease- Composed by Clint Mansell

Side note: The Fountain soundtrack is amazing. If you don't own it, BUY IT TODAY.

What type of men do I like?
Go- Blink 182

What kind of job will I have in the future?
Around The World- Red Hot Chili Peppers

Double Trouble

Double Trouble
Originally uploaded by HotsauceJane.

I have rediscovered the fun that I can have with Photo Booth. Lord help me.

Tardy people and their tardiness!!

I've always been a big stickler about tardiness. I made very sure to never be tardy in high school and I make it my goal to NEVER be tardy in college. There is nothing more disrespectful then a person walking into class over 15 minutes late, interrupting a lecture that could be detrimental to my college success, just because they overslept. I am more annoyed by the people who are consistently late to class (when I say "late" I am referring to over 10 minutes). If you KNOW that it's going to take you 25 minutes to drive to campus 5 minutes to park and 5 minutes to walk to whatever building you need to be in the PLAN ACCORDINGLY. I do. If I can get to class on time and live in freakin' Egypt, then you can get to class living wherever you live.

and gives us an extra ten minutes to get to class. He doesn't mind if we're running a little late because he understands that is it hard to get to a class that early in the morning. THIS GIRL runs 45 minutes late. How ridiculous is that? Last week we had a critique and we started just around 8:05 am. My teacher had begun by asking a series of questions about what we considered art and what we considered "good art". We begun looking at Which brings me to the Queen of the Tardiness. The teacher for the 8am class is pretty lenienteveryone's photos and talked about the ones that stood out the most. Right at 8:50 am SHE walks in. She notices that everyone's photos are on the wall. Of course the teacher stops...there is an awkward pause as we all stare at her. She pins her photos up on the wall and sits down. My teacher begins to talk again. About 15 minutes later her CELL PHONE rings. Naturally this completely distracts for the current discussion that we were having. Alan tells her to turn it off and gives her the look of death. She looks at him and says, "It's a client." As if that is justification for keeping your cell phone ON during class...a class that your significantly late to.

There is no excuss for being THAT late to a class. What upsets me is, she is being disrespectful and she doesn't even care. Her attitude about it (the "whatever" attitude) is bothersome. I can't understand that. If I PAY for a class, I'm sure as heck going to attend it.

Cletus and Baylee-Ann visit the movie theater

There are few amusing stories that tickle me quite like this one.

Justin had just arrived to work and we were discussing normal manager things. After I caught him up on all the day's drama I left the comfort of the office and walked into the manager station only to be struck with the sight of two CUSTOMERS sitting AT THE MANAGER STATION in our comfy MANAGER CHAIRS feeding each other Dippin' Dots looking as white-trashy as possible with their MATCHING overalls (both looked like they were straight out of central casting). I must admit that there was a second there were I was completely dumbfounded. I thought to myself, "Really? REALLY? You're sitting in our MANAGER STATION.... by our COMPUTER.... enjoying the comfort of our MANAGER CHAIRS...REALLY?" After I collected my thoughts I forced what words I could, out of my mouth:

"Um...Hi."
"Hello"-the Male who was feeding his girlfriend the Dippin' Dots-
"Uh can I help you?"
"No."
"You need to leave. This our manager station and you should not be here."

I couldn't help but hold in my giggles as I ran into the office to tell Justin what had happened. As I am finishing up the story our loyal employee Greg enters with the same dumbfounded look I had on my face and asks, "Did you know them?" to which I responded "No. Definitely not."Because I want to give you an ACCURATE PICTURE of what these lovely people looked like, you will find a photo attached to this note. I'd like to note how they went with a subtle green overall and plaid shirts.