Andrew and I's pumpkins bond. Notice how happy mine looks. Andrew said it reminded him of Mike from Monster's Inc and that I should be paying Pixar for the use of their image.

 

Kerri tries her hand at "Pumpkin Carving."

 

Andrew makes his "AHHHHH" face.

 

Andrew attempts to stab his pumpkin. (Mine is the one to the right with one eye and a craaaazy smile)

 

Everyone, meet Becky. She too joined in on the pumpkin carving fun-ness.

 

And then said, "Whaa?!"

There are 20 members of my family going on this cruise. That is everyone on my mother's side. EVERYONE. Whoa...

Keep the traffic flowing

iTunes: "Jesus Walks" by Kanye West

I am: a low down dirty fool.

I find it completely annoying when I leave messages for people specifically stating that I require a call in return and receive no call. Especially when I am in dire need of talking to them not for entertainment reasons but for actual dire reasons like I'm being attacked by clones (haha, bad joke)! Now even though this is definitely on my top ten pet peeves list, I definitely do not deserve to complain because I, too fail to return calls. Yeah, I know. It's annoying.

Oh wait, the phone's ringing...yep, yep yep yep. ARG! FEAR MY WRATH!!

All anger aside, I got fabulous news on Friday. Fab news. So fab that I wanted to run to the top of the Springfield 8 and scream it at the top of my lungs, but I didn't. Time didn't allow it.

I'm freaking out about this cruise. Really am.
1. I have yet to pack.
2. I do not want to re-enact the Titanic (though I might finally get that well-deserved Oscar of mine).
3. It's hurricane season.
4. I have a Metals project due the day I get back.
5. I have an Art History test the day I get back.

Though I am looking forward to seeing my sister. I only get to see her about two times a year so I'm psyched. I just hope I don't get attacked by man-eating dolphins. That would suck. I'd probably still have to hobble back and take that Art History test.

But back to me having an angry day:
So do you think that some people just wake up in the morning and say to themselves, "Hey! I'm going to act like a total tool today!"? Hm. Interesting.

Why Hannah should drive me home EVERY NIGHT

Natalie had invited us all over to watch some sort of movie (wish I could remember what it was) and well Hannah was responsible for driving Ben H. and I home. So there we were driving along talking about how crappy the movie was and....

Me: Look out! (notices poor innocent skunk in the middle of the road)
Hannah: F***! (not even attempting to censor herself or swerve, she hits the skunk and I watch in horror)
Me: OH GOD OH GOD OH GOD YOU JUST KILLED....
Hannah: F***! It's going to take a month to get the smell of dead animal out of my car!
Ben H: ::laughing like a mad man in the back seat::
Me: You...just...hit...that..
Hannah: F***!!
Me: I saw....that skunk die!! I looked right into it's eyes!
Hannah: F***!
Ben H: ::crying from laughing so hard::
[then the smell hits]
Everyone: ahhhhh!!

Verbose Friday Five

1. Five words that describe your current living situation:
[in five words...] I pay absolutely no rent

2. Five words that describe your current job situation:
inferno, torture, vile, detestable, dreaded

3. Five words that describe your current style situation:
rare, careless, unparalleled, fantastic, amusing

4. Five words that describe your current friend situation:
primo, stellar, wicked, awesome [to the MAX!], jocular

5. Five words that describe your current money situation:
[in five words...] Spent it all on this

I worked on this today. It looks 10 times better from the side them from the front. I'm not finished with it and I've changed it a million times now. Urg. I hate working with chalk pastels! 

Numbers

iTunes: "Stay Don't Go" by Spoon
I am: a thrift store chair

Number of squirrels I saw on campus, just today:
5

Number of times someone asked me about my tattoo/mentioned my tattoo today:
4

Number of times Kevin said "Your mom" tonight:
2

Number of miles to the Pasadena Museum of California Art:
1,605 mi (about 1 day 3 hours by car)

Number of Led Zeppelin shirts I've seen at MSU in the last two weeks:
12 (I'm not even joking)

Number of times I tried to re-record my voicemail greeting today:
5

Number of songs on my iPod:
772

Number of annoyed voicemails I got today:
1

Amount of cash I need for my baby:
$2,299.00

Voicemails that make my day

All from today...

Dad:

"I fell for your voicemail. I thought you would enjoy hearing that. Give me a call back. We need to talk about the cruise."

Hannah:

"I fell for your voicemail AGAIN...I hate you. I really do. So much. Anyway I'm going to be at worship service till [insert correct time here] so you can call me before then or just leave a message. Or whatever."

Kevin: My vote for best voice message ever

"Laura....your voicemail is so annoying.....it's too long....and annoying...and I hate it....and I hate you....so.....in return.....I am leaving you.....a.....reallllly....long message. In response to your message to me...no. I think when you asked if I wanted to borrow the movie you really meant, 'Will you watch it with me?' Yes. Yes I will watch it with you....next to you...on your couch...yeah. So yeah. I'll watch it with you. Bye."

Rockin' Friday Five

1. Create a band using anyone you want, from any other band, or whoever. Heck, put yourself in it.

Dave Grohl on drums (you might remember him from Nirvana or the Foo Fighters or Queens of the Stone Age), Dean Bernardini would be our bassist (from Chevelle), Matthew Bellamy (MUSE) and Pete Loeffler (Chevelle) on lead guitar, vocals, and keyboard. I'd manage this band and require at least 30% of the profits and if anyone tried to say that we suck, we just beat them senseless.

2. Name it.

They'd be called "Sugarless Candy." I'm not quite sure why but at the time it seemed like a good idea.

3. And tell us what your first single will be called.

The titles wouldn't be important and probably wouldn't even relate to the songs but I can tell you that they will not be naming a song "Stockholm syndrome." Every band seems to have some song named that and "Sugarless Candy is too cool to be like every band.

4. It's a one-hit wonder, isn't it?

No, not really. They have the beauty of MUSE mixed with the awesomeness of Chevelle. No one will be able to resist our music. In fact, their music will be so powerful that people will throw money at us.

5. Do survive the public scrutiny?

Hello. Dave Grohl is in our band.

Rules to running into old acquaintances

So there you are sitting, minding your own business when you run into an old friend that you haven't seen for quite some time. He/she ask you how you are and general conversation arises. Everything is pleasant and you wonder why, oh why, you didn't call this person back sooner. They tell you about how awesome their life is and how super fantastic their significant-other is. Then he/she asks, in that friendly and polite manor, who you are seeing (just to keep the conversation, mind you. They have no underlined reason for asking.) You release that normal but awkward laugh and try to explain that you are still as lonely and pathetic as you were when you last saw them. Silence. You wait...still with the awkward laugh and then person says, "Oh, really? Wow. Have you dated anyone?"
You respond, "Nope. As you might have guessed my life is still as pitiful as the day I met you but thanks for bringing that up. I mean, really, I needed to be reminded today about how terrible I am at love and such." THEN, as if they didn't get the hint, they ask, "Why?" Who in their right mind asks why? Seriously. WHY ASK WHY. You know why. Don't ask. Don't. It's really not necessary. Anyway, stunned by the fact that this ignoramus has the audacity to ask, "Why?" you find yourself lacking in reasons and decide that this would be the appropriate moment to start glaring at the person in hopes that your evil gaze will cause their HEAD TO EXPLODE.

No news is good news

Last 10 songs to play on my iPod while in "shuffle" mode:

Under My Umbrella- Incubus
Walkin' Back to Georgia- Jim Croce
Best Imitation of Myself- Ben Folds (live tour)
Grab Thy Hand- Chevelle (live tour)
I have to put some commentary in just because this CD is so great. Before Chevelle starts playing this they say, "Here's one for the ladies in the house...". Good stuff.
The Small Print- Muse
Nobody Knows When You're Down & Out- Eric Clapton (Unplugged)
Aliens Exist- Blink 182
Breathe- Nickelback
Televators- The Mars Volta
Father of Mine- Everclear

It doesn't seem like any of those songs mix well with each other, but it doesn't matter. I really should delete that Mars Volta song off of iTunes though. It's really crappy.

So, as if seeing that I listen to Jim Croce, isn't enough proof that I'm pretty gosh darn lame, I must inform you that I almost threw my Xbox out the window yesterday afternoon. I was trying to beat this "level" on DDR. I had been playing it for about 3 hours straight, no break, no water, no nothin' when I realized that it just wasn't going to happen. I'm sure I could attribute my lack of awesomeness to the fact that I was highly dehydrated but that would just be some sort of cop out. Natalie: Feel free to buy this for me.

Which reminds me: Hannah...see, it can't be lame if it's everywhere.

SPOOOOOOOON!

iTunes: "I Turn My Camera On" by Spoon
I am: lethargic

I love Wal-Mart. Wait. Correction. I love the toy section of Wal-Mart. I was hanging around there today and ran into the new Furby that apparently recognizes speech. You pat it's belly and it'll ask you "You...friend?" and then you are supposed to respond.

So there I am. Standing in front of this adorable and yet freaky thing while it asks me if I'm it's friend over and over. I look around...make sure no one was around...and quietly respond "yes" in hopes that it would shut up. Then it starts freakin' out and made what sounded like some sort of obnoxious "crying" noise. Naturally it drew all sorts of attention. I have never been so embarrassed. Clearly this "Furby" is made by Satan.

Nice gate...yeah...

iTunes: "Right Through You" by Alanis Morissette (the acoustic version)
I am: popping Tylenol like it's some sort of sweet, sweet candy.

My lungs/chest/whatever are killing me this morning. This is the second time in the last week I've had these terrible pain attacks that have lasted over 24 hours. I probably have a lung tumor or lung cancer or maybe even some sort of freakish virus that causes my lungs to turn to mush. I'm probably going to die. Try to get Muse to play at the Wake. Invite George Lucas and then when he walks in the door, jump him. Just thought I'd let you know.

Anyway, why didn't anyone tell me about this Jagged Little Pill Acoustic album sooner? I typically do not enjoy the "Emo-ness" of Ms. Morissette but this album is toned down compared to the original. I hate you all for not mentioning it. None of you will be included in my will.

In other news I have had this package for someone sitting on my desk for over two weeks now because I cannot seem to find the time to drop by the post office and get it out of my hair. I feel super bad about it because I told the person to be expecting it...and that was like, what? A month ago? I am a super fabulous person. Super. I am considering just giving the silly thing to Andrew with a stack of cash and asking him politely to mail it for me. Then if he won't I'll attempt to blackmail him. And when that doesn't work, I will beg.

Saw A History of Violence last night. Talk about your inappropriate sex scenes. Uck. It's pretty bad when the entire audience laughs uncomfortably at a sex scene. The movie was slow, but awesome. The dialog sucked but the fight scenes rocked my face off! I give it 3 stars.

Example of the worst dialog since Episode One:
Character 1: "Nice gate..."
Character 2: "Yeah."

Ok-so-it's-a-late Friday Five

I have no intention on apologizing.

1. If magically thrown into an animated series you would be...
Obviously the star. With the wacky adventures I have now (and I'm not even being filmed!), I believed that thousands of kids ages 5-17 would enjoy my eccentric entertainment on television on Saturday mornings.

2. Your "best pal" would be...
Hmm I would prefer to refer to this person as my "side-kick" because I will be saving the world at least once every episode. I believe that my side-kick will be some sort of robotic dog or possibly "super dog" that will carry all my necessary items for protecting this great city from danger. Think of this side-kick as a utility belt with legs and fur.

3. Your adventures would include...
As I have stated above, I will save the world day by day from the wrath of evil MSU squirrels, Emo Boys who's music torments the ears of young ones, music industry lawyers, and Steve Jobs.

4. You would teach young and innocent children that...
Buying my products (I will come out with an entire line of toys based on the series as well as a breakfast cereal, line of hair-care products, and a video game) makes them better people.

5. In the end, your series would last how long?
I'd say we'd have a good run at 2 years. Then Fox would cancel us but DVD sales would show them what morons they are. Eventually (about 1-2 years later) they'll bring us back but it'll just be the same story ideas just "revamped" enough that people still find them entertaining.

Fudge and fudge again!

iTunes: "Creep" (acoustic on the My Iron Lung album) by Radiohead
I am: suffering from a severe case of the "hic-ups"

Kevin took me out riding on his motorcycle. Holy...freakin'...crap...it was awesome! I am totally going to buy a motorcycle and ride it everywhere!! Totally.

The theater isn't getting "Waiting..." Yes, that's right. We aren't getting the new Ryan Reynolds movie. Now imagine how upset I might be. Then multiply that times 10 and that's how upset I really am. I told my boss I was going to call up our film booker at home office and start crying until she got us a copy of it. I think Lori thought I was joking.

In other Ryan Reynolds news: yesterday I did not buy Amityville Horror. I know! Here's the story:

I went to the mall to get a new pair of shoes since my wicked red sneakers were almost dead and somehow ended up in the Buckle. Well I don't usually shop there (talk about bad prices) but they tend to have shoes that last longer then those crappy shoes at Wal-Mart. I immediately made my way to the back of the store where the sale items are kept in hopes of finding moderately priced funky sneakers. While examining a nice pair of overly priced Pumas I hear, "Hi, can I help you look for something?" I look up to see a beautiful excuse for a man smiling at me. Lip ring, tight punk shirt that showed off his awesome pecs, and hair to die for. Naturally my reaction is to stutter and drool all over myself but I was able to force the words, "I'm looking for a cool pair of shoes" out instead.
"Hm. Well, what are the shoes for?" he asked.
"Oh, for school. I want something that won't kill my feet." I said laughing uncomfortably.
"Cool. What colors are you interested in?"
"I really am leaning toward anything bright. Like this green or that orange."
"That's cool, that's cool. Well, let me grab you some stuff to try on!"
While I tried on the shoes he brought me we made conversation about what school I went to and what school he went to. It was nice. Had this man told me that if I bought a pair of the $70 Pumas that his life would be much better I probably would have bought them. That is how sad and pathetic I was at the point. By the time I finally made my purchase and left I realized I had just spent 45 minutes in that one store and did not have time to swing by Best Buy for Amityville. ::Sigh:: I need a man.

Explain this...

Does anyone want to explain to my why Lemony Snicket's Celeb Playlist on the iTunes music store is better then Elijah Wood's playlist?

Here, see for yourself...

Text messaging heaven

[Mocking Hamlet with Ethan Hawk over several text messages]

When reading the quoted lines you must prentend we are talking like Ethan Hawk or else the whole thing is completely pointless. Imagine the voice of Ethan Hawk being played by...um...Strong Sad (Homestar Runner) because that is what we were going for.

Me pretending to be Hamlet: "I'm emo and I walk into Blockbusters world wide and quote poetry to myself aloud!"

Hannah pretending to be Hamlet: "Look at my knit ski cap and blazer/hoodie combo. Watch me fight Liev Schreiber and lose. Too emo to function!"

Me still pretending to be Hamlet:"Boohoo! My daddy died and yet still find time in the afterlife to drop into my apartment nightly and rant about how my uncle put poison in his ear!"

Hannah doing the Hamlet thing: "We hugged once. It was like embracing a cold pudding. I've never felt to loved!"

Me...yep I'm Hamlet: "Too Bad my girlfriend's dad is a dirty you-know-what and she doesn't enjoy my utterly depressing rantings"

Hannah/Hamlet: "And too bad she drowned herself after I killed her dad and told her she was a whore."

Me/Hamlet: "I told her to go to a nunnery but I guess she thought that meant the fountain int he lobby of the New York Museum of Modern Art."

Hannah stillllll playing Hamlet: "I always knew she was a ditz."

Me doing an awesome Hamlet impression: "Did anyone else sense the sexual tension between my girlfriend and her brother? In all fairness I find myself attracted to her brother as well."

Me playing Hamlet: "Yet I am waaaay more attractive."

Hannah doing typical Hamlet things: "Wait, I KNOW I AM!"

Hannah being Hamlet still: "Especially in my fresh-from-England leather coat!"

Me claiming to be Hamlet: "I have that wonderful English smell to me. That's how I get everyone to love me."

Hannah being Hamlet one last time: "Except when they kick my a** in a graveyard."

Me just being Hamlet: "Or Laundromat."

Hannah: [No longer sporting an Ethan Hawk mocking tone] Best place for a smackdown ever.

Me: Tide can be a very effective tool for taking someone out and fabric softener can be deadly.

Hannah: especially if it comes from a vending machine.

Hannah: Stupid Snuggles.

Me: Darn him and his cuteness of death!

Hannah: Yeah!

Hannah: He's probably got teeth under all that fur. How did we start taking about this?

Me: He could strangle you with his sheets of ultimate softness.

Me: How do you explain to God that you were strangled by Snuggles? "Well I went in for a hug and one thing led to another..."

Hannah: Bwahahaha!

I [BRAIN] Zombies aka Ode to Hannah's Genius

Yes. In case you were wondering I AM cool enough to make my own "I (Brain) Zombies" shirt. Does anyone else find it funny that you can clearly see my dorky toothbrush in the background?

EDIT: So I am proud to say that my entire church, with the exception of Andrew and possibly James, thinks I'm insane for wearing this shirt, which is awesome because now I can blame random outbursts during service on my mental instability. Whoohoo!

METAL class is getting better...well not really better but more tolerable (watch today go horribly). I turned in my ring project...ugh. On a side note: there is this girl in my class who says I look like a character from her web comic, "College Bound". She is so convinced that I am this character that she calls me "Brick". In fact she took a picture of me the other day to send to her boyfriend so that they could discuss how much I look like this character. I'll admit it's a bit creepy but what are you gonna do?

I am often told that I remind people of some sort of cartoon character. I guess it's because I'm so ANIMATED!! Ha-ha-ha!!! ::rofl:: Oh, the joke was bad...but anyway...I usually just take that as a compliment or if I am referred to as the "right" cartoon character I kick them in the shin and run off. I swear if I get called Velma ever again I scream like Dakota Fanning in War of the Worlds and don't think anyone wants that.

How to scare off creepy guys in just a few sentences

I was downtown last weekend and took some people to Rollie-Pollie Sandwiches (oh it was so good). Well, the clerk there was blatantly flirting with me. It was so bad that the guys that were with me kept referring to him as my "future husband." I'll admit that I enjoyed the attention but he really wasn't my type and I was in the overwhelming mood to say the following...

Me: "Look, I need to know where all this flirtatious behavior is going. I really don't have time for this seductive such and such. If you are planning on asking me out I need some serious notice so that I may plan out our lives together. I need to plan the wedding, the honeymoon, and name
our 5 kids. There is just too much to do and I really don't do well under short notice so please tell me your intentions."

Granted I didn't say it..I still would have paid to see the look on his face.

concussion

iTunes: "Playing With Fire" by Emery
I am: obtuse

Excuse me while I bang my head several times into my keyboard.


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Chipper Friday five

AHH! My McSweeney's and art that I bought from the Mud House came today!

Five things that make you giggle:
Becca's honking, the "Just Friends" trailer, the rabid squirrels on campus chasing the Freshmen, the "Caper" email by Strongbad, and Andrew's voice mail.

Five things that made you smile today:
Finding out that my McSweeney's books and art from the Mud House came, the mental image of my mother trying to put a tiny sweater on our Dachshund, "Moo-ze", "Is that a Star Wars Fraternity?", and hearing that Deborah has used her valuable time to teach her bird how to bark.

Most entertaining word:
"sacagawea"

Most enjoyable time of the day:
The second I see my replacement come in to work and know that I get to go home and cuddle with my Xbox.

Best 5 seconds of your life:
Hm. Tough one. Probably the first 5 seconds I got to put my arm around Jared Leto and got a nice whiff of his awesome cologne. Mmm.

I don't take requests

iTunes: "Point #1" by Chevelle
I am: turbulent

I really don't think I have quite earned the right to complain about anything considering that just a few days ago I met one of my favorite movie stars/music icons but I'm awesome enough that I can get away with it.

I think more then anything I piss myself off. And more then anything, I get pissed when I regress to the state of a 16 year-old and whine about how things aren't going my way.

My Metals/Jewelry class is pissing me off, (as well as other events that are just as consequential to my terrible day but will not be observed in this post nor any conversation that anyone might have with me about my terrible day) and it annoys me that I am getting agitated about a ridiculous art class that is unfortunately required for my BFA Degree.

There is my rant for the day. I will return to being the happy-go-lucky me in a few hours when I am on a "Red Bull" and "Pixie-Stick" (I think it is properly spelled s-t-i-k) high. Till then, I bid you all a good night.

Adventures in Lawrence, KS

Andrew and Justin find time to nap while we wait another 30 minutes for our food at the Mass St. Deli.

Christa waits for her food

Daniel waits patiently for our food at the Mass St. Deli 

Random shot 

Andrew fights off the cold that almost caused him to not see Jimmy Eat World.

Origin of a bad hair day

Me: lalala I think I'll get up at 6:30 am so that I can actually get a parking space at MSU.
My Hair: AHHH!
Me: Dear Lord! What was that?
My hair: IT'S MEEEE! I'M IN PAIN!
Me: Oh my. Are you ok?
Hair: Nooo! Why didn't you put hair gel in me yesterday?
Me: Well I thought...
Hair: Yeah that's right. You 'thought'. I think we all know what happens when you think!
Me: Look now I just want to get you styled and head off to school. We can discuss the hair gel thing later.
Hair: No.
Me: I said yes. Now style darn you!
Hair: No. I don't feel like it.
Me: Fine. You have forced me to pull out the curling iron.
Hair: Ha-ha. Try your best.
Me: Ug!
Hair: You cannot contain my wildness!
Me: FINE I WILL JUST GET A SCARF AND END THIS!
Hair: Just try to put that scarf in me. It ain't gonna happen. Nope.
Me: AHHHH!!

Clowns to the left of me and jokers to the right

iTunes: "Stuck in the middle with you" by the Steve Miller Band
I am: vacuous

I could post my Jared Leto story but I feel it is better told over the phone so if you want to hear it (and you do) then you need to call me.

I'm having serious problems being incredibly indecisive lately. It took me 25 minutes yesterday to decide if I what brand of orange soda I wanted to buy from Price Cutter. I have two major decisions to make in the next 2 months and I have yet to even lean in one director or another. Maybe I should work on that.

I get to do more soldering tomorrow in Metals. I am so totally bringing my digital camera because I have to see how awesome I look with a blowtorch.

Some girl, actually Courtney's little sister (Lindsay), at work suggested me taking her Senior pictures. I told her I'd do it for free and she'd just pay for the copies of the prints that she wanted. I don't know if everything will work out or not but if it does I would totally be stoked.

Closet fun at 1 AM

I have no idea what I am going to wear today/tomorrow for the Jared Leto thing. I mean I've thought about it but I really I have no idea...

My options are as follows:

"Marry me Jared Leto"

"I'm too hardcore for Jared Leto" aka "I'm a Consumer Whore/The Animation Show shirt"


"I'm so 'Indie' that even that girl from the Mud House hates me"

I blame this all on the fact that I am a girl. Me and my stupid girly-ness.

Melodic Friday Five

1. Best Make-out song:
"Fair" by Remy Zero is pretty nice but any Boy II Men song will do. I suggest "Hey Lover."

2. Best headbangin' song:
"I never told you what I do for a living" by My Chemical Romance is my personal favorite.

3. Best driving music:
"Road Trippin'" by The Red Hot Chili Peppers, "Every me, Every you" by Placebo, "No Breaks" by Offspring, "The Small Print" by Muse, and "Hitchin' a Ride" by Green Day.

4. Best "I'm dancin like a craaaaazy person" song:
When it comes to dancing like I'm mentally unstable I've always found "Baby Got Back" by Sir-Mix-Alot helpful.

5. You're own personal theme music:
"Hyper Music" by Muse or "Feeling Good" by Muse.

Talk about plastic...

The Art Walk the other week was so stellar. In one of these shops (by the Skinny Improv) they had these 4 or 5 girls posing like mannequins. There was a huge crowd around the shop. Ironically no one went inside but maybe that wasn't the point. Maybe the owners of this clothing store were trying to convey some kind of message about today's society being as stiff and rigid as a mannequin. Or maybe it was shameless attempt to sell more clothes. Either way, I was impressed.

I finally loaded all my pictures from this month's Art Walk tonight and boy did about 50% of them suck. That's ok. I get to meet Jared Leto. Anyway, I love this picture...I have no idea why but it is the most awesome picture of Ben H. that I have. Granted this is the only picture of him that I have, it tis the best! Ben H. you are one of the easiest subject to photograph! 

Fallin' yes, I am Falling

iTunes: "I've just seen a face" by The Beatles
I am: totally not prepared.

I have yet to pick out what I will have Jared Leto and 30 seconds to Mars sign.
I have yet to pick out what I will wear to meet Jared Leto and 30 Seconds to Mars.
I have yet to come up with an intelligent thing to say to Jared Leto and 30 Seconds to Mars.

This is not going to end well for me. I can feel it.

Someone told me that I should ask Jared Leto for a peck on the cheek but with how shy I am around guys already plus the fact that this is one of the most attractive men in Hollywood (actually named top 20 most beautiful people two years in a row), I really can't see that happening.

All I want to do is tell him that his music is awesome and possibly ask him where he gets inspiration (that is such a geeky question BTW) and then tell his brother Shannon Leto that I really love the photography on the first album.

AHHHHH!

I WON LUNCH WITH JARED LETO AND 30 SECONDS TO MARS!! I ACTUALLY WON!!!!

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!

Fear-Provoking Friday Five

1. Goosebumps: Freaky Awesome or Cheesy?

I was always a fan of Goosebumps. They were cheesy in an awesome, “I’m going to teach you about morals by having this kid be terrorized by his worst fear” way.

2. The Ring: The reason I currently wet my bed at night or the reason I currently hate all American adaptations of Japanese horror movies?

I think the Ring 2 is currently the “reason I hate all American adaptations of Japanese Horror Movies.” The movie was so lame that I wanted to eat a bucket of popcorn with extra butter rather than sit in that theater any longer. As for The Ring, that movie freaked me out. I seriously couldn’t watch anything on VHS for weeks without someone else in the room.

3. Wes Craven has locked you in a room which materializes all of your fears. What lurks in the shadows?

Dolphins who sound like Jeff Goldblum when they talk.

4. Scariest Celeb: Angelina "I wear my husband's blood around my neck" Jolie or Cillian "I always play the creepy skinny guy in movies" Murphy?

Cillian Murphy creeps me out more than any celebrity. I distrust all skinny men since I saw the “Machinist.” Not to mention, Cillian is too skinny for his own good.

5. While driving down a winding dirt road off in the country you accidentally hit something significantly larger than a squirrel. You get out to see what poor woodland creature you have slaughtered only to find that you have just run over Stephen King (making this the 5th time Stephen had been hit by a car). You examine your choices and decide that...

…he looks reasonably ok for a man who has just been hit by a car and I end up taking him back to my house which is conveniently located in the middle of no where. When he awakes at my house I say, “I am your number one fan, Mr. King. There is nothing to worry about. You are going to be just fine. I am your number one fan” in a creepy Kathy Bates voice. I nurse him back to health for several months while never allowing him to leave. When his is well enough to type again I force him to write a new zombie novel that includes me as one of the main characters. At some point he tries to set me on fire and escapes. But on the plus side, the book is a huge success.
-a la “Misery.” If you haven’t seen that movie I HIGHLY recommend it.-

The Cave

Tonight I shall call the cave, known as projection, my home for a total of 5.5 hours.

Oh, and what do I have to look forward to, you ask?

Dive, thoughts, down to my soul

I went to borders tonight in hopes of buying a copy of Richard III, one of the few Shakespearean plays that I have not read completely. Oh man, that is one delicious play. Talk about awesome villains!

"I, that am curtail'd of this fair proportion,

Cheated of feature by dissembling nature,

Deform'd, unfinish'd, sent before my time

Into this breathing world scarce half made up,

And that so lamely and unfashionable

That dogs bark at me as I halt by them;

--Why, I, in this weak piping time of peace,

Have no delight to pass away the time,

Unless to spy my shadow in the sun,And descant on mine own deformity:

And therefore,--since I cannot prove a lover,

To entertain these fair well-spoken days,--

I am determined to prove a villain,

And hate the idle pleasures of these days.

Plots have I laid, inductions dangerous,

By drunken prophecies, libels, and dreams,

To set my brother Clarence and the king

In deadly hate the one against the other..."

Interesting fact and completely sidetracking my story: Most people remember the play for it's famous opening line of "Now is the winter of our discontent, made glorious summer by this sun of York."

Now don't get me wrong, I love Borders, but every freakin' time I go in there they don't have the exact book that I want and I end up buying some worthless book that I thought I needed. Well, when I shimmied over to the Shakespearean section I was not at all shocked to see that they only had ONE copy of Richard III and it was a "I'm in high school and need the cheapest copy of Richard III out there" copy. I was very upset. So, to cool my nerves I attempted to find a somewhat new Dave Eggers book called "How We Are Hungry", a book that I have been waiting to read for a very long time. Once again I was NOT surprised to see that they ONLY had a hardback copy that would steal $22 out of my wallet. I restrained myself and walked out of the store without buying a gosh darn thing. I think I have only done this two times.

On a side note: I got my grade back for last week's email essay for my Lit. of the New testament Class and it was awesomely wicked! She said that I posed questions that I should have brought up in class so that we all could discuss them!

Don't have a Cow, man!

iTunes: "Wait" by The Beatles
I am: grieving for cows everywhere

While driving to work this evening a truck hauling 2 cows slowly drove in front of me. I took noticed of how every time the truck ran over a rough patch in the road the cow's belly would giggle ever so slightly. It was quite mesmerizing. I couldn't help but stare. It was like some sort of "cow lava lamp" rippling, waving. Anyway, back to my story, as I went to pass the truck one of the cows looked at me. It looked into my SOUL and moo-ed. And you know what it was saying? It said, "Don't eat meeeeee!" I was completely filled with conviction. I vowed that I would give up all red meat, for one day in honor of that cow.

Ironically I ate Taco Bell 30 minutes later.

iTunes: "Revennga" by System of a Down
I am: livid, in the strongest sense


After viewing 2 clips for Serenity I have lost all faith in the movie being all that I had hoped it would be. It saddens me.

Rotten

iTunes: "Rape Me" by Nirvana

had bad lunch

feel sick

going to puke

possibly watch TV after

then eat 10 pounds of cake

Freaky Friday Five

1. If you were forced to switch bodies (a la Freaky Friday) for 1 day, who would you IRONICALLY be forced to switch with?

Well as irony would have it, I would sadly be forced to change places with Lindsay Lohan when we accidentally both wear cursed Chinese imported Converse All-Stars at the same time.

2. Why?

It is a well known fact that Lindsay Lohan and I have had a few differences in opinion for the past year or so. One of which has to do with how she thinks it's ok to be an annoying brat.

3. What craaaazy adventures would you have?

As L.L., I would walk around all day in tiny skits and do typical Lindsay things like make-out with tons of movie stars. I wouldn't really care who. I mean I am Linday Lohan. At some point during the day I would realize that, that cold sore on my mouth is really more then just a "cold sore" (if you catch my drift). I may cry a bit but then I’d go shopping and everything would be fine. After a long day on the set of “Mean Girls 2: A New-Time low” I would find time to scream at an extra or two for blocking my sunlight thus creating a blotchy tan on my $5,000 body. When it’s time to retire to my flippin’ huge mansion I would bring a director or two along just to make sure I get that role in the new Mel Gibson movie.

4. What important lesson would you learn by the end of the day?

That though L.L. seems cold and heartless to the media, she really does have a heart. It’s just covered up by 12 layers of makeup and hair care products.

5. Is it just me or did Jamie Lee Curtis overact in "Freaky Friday"?

Considering that I wrote this Friday Five, I am naturally going to agree with myself.

Ran around work with,

"Ask me about my great prices on souls"

on my left hand for the last hour of my shift. I had no takers.

90's style baby!

iTunes: “I am the Walrus” by The Beatles
I am: The Walrus, Goo goo g' joob!

I don’t believe this day could be better summer up by anyone but By Keanu Reeves so don’t blame me when I use 90’s terminology to describe this day as “excellent.” Really the stories are told better over the phone but I can share this one enjoyable moment.

[We are discussing the phrase “Avoid Rape, Say Yes”]
Justin: “Oh man, I’m totally going to make a poster that says that and post it on my ceiling above my bed. That way, when girls make their way into my room and sit on my bed all I have to do is start stripping and go, “Eh?” and everything would be sweet.”
Me: “I don’t believe that would work very well. I also think I am slightly offended by that as well.”
Justin: “I guess you’re right. I mean if my mom came into my room and looked up…well I don’t think I want to go there.”

Crap. I forgot the Friday Five.

iTunes: "Hyper Music" by Muse
I am: a secret member of the Mensur

So after weeks of bugging Natalie and Hannah about being terrible friends and not posting my Friday Five on time I ironically forgot about it this week. I do hope they will find it in their hearts to forgive me. Years of doing acid have fried my brain.


As usual I am hosting the most exclusive dinner part of the year...

1. Who are the select few you invite?
Matthew Bellamy, Ryan Reynolds, Christian Bale, Bono, Steven Spielberg, Ewan McGregor, Dave Eggers, Jesus, either Natalie or Hannah (I'd make them fight to the death for the prize of being invited), and Danny Boyle. I would possibly invite another friend or two depending upon

2. What sexy thing do you wear?
Hmm that is an excellent question. What would I wear? I would have to go with "destroyed" jeans, some sort of sexy vintage rock t-shirt (sliced in all the right places), a classy jacket to dress the whole ensemble up a bit, and my Converse all-star heels.

3. What do you serve as sustenance?

Thai. All Thai, all the time.

4. Games?

The night would start off with a delightful discussion about the music and movie industry. We would argue over if censorship has gone too far in the movie industry and how the music industry continues to agressively attack it's customers who download music and burn CDs. We'd bring up making, "Trade Fair"
Jesus and Christian Bale would discuss the growth of China over the past few years.
Bono and Dave Eggers would make plans to write a book together concerning the spread of Aids in Africa. Natalie/Hannah would drool over Bono.
Matthew Bellamy and Ewan McGregor would burst out into song (a la Moulin Rouge) and Stephen Spielberg would tear up from the beauty of their voices.
Danny Boyle would pitch the idea of a Zombie movie to Stephen, who turns out to love it and plans to have Christian Bale star in it with Rachel McAdams. Ryan Reynolds would butt in every so often.
When our hearty discussion is finished we'd move into the living room where we'd play a rousing game of Pictionary. Afterwards, we'd play healthy game of hide-and-go-seek in which Stephen would be "it". After the entire group is unable to locate Ryan Reynolds and I for almost an hour, we miraculously re-appear back in the living room, hair mangled and lipstick smudged. I would look at everyone and say, “Wha? I was experiencing an asthma attack and Ryan offered to sooth my labored breathing.” Ryan Reynolds would mutter something to the extent of "You bet there was labored breathing." but no one would really hear him. Jesus would just look at the both of us with his hands on his hips, shaking his head in disapproval. Everyone at once would all say, “Oh Laura...”

On a side note: I'd like to say that we were making out nothing more.
So don't let your minds wander there.

5. Now, how do you get these mongrels out of your house?

Um, who said anything about wanting them to leave?

I'm gonna be honest here

iTunes: "Revolution" by The Beatles
I am: a consumer whore

So I regret to inform that I have come to the realization that I....am a consumer whore. ::screams:: I buy coffee from Star Bucks, I shop at Wal-Mart, and I shop (well more like "shopped") at American Eagle. ::gasp!:: The other day I was on the phone with a friend and mentioned that I was on my way out, to go on somewhat of a "shopping spree" at AE. His reaction was a natural, "NO!!"

I am a terrible person for shopping there. I really am. I should be shot down like the dirty harlot that I am.

Let's be honest people. The types of people that shop at AE tend to be, well, they're not individuals. They all look the same, talk the same, and walk the same. It's quite depressing. They're like robots without the cool gears. Oh, I remember the days when I used to make fun of those people. I would laugh and laugh.. and then I became one. It all started with me just dropping in and buying one screened tee and escalated to me buying pants, sweaters, and even a winter jacket. I hear that the first step to recovery is admitting that there is a problem and that you need help. Well, I'm here people and I need to be weaned off of American Eagle some after school drug.

Tomorrow I shall wear my Consumer Whore shirt as a symbol of my new life without AE!

I so rarely am able to wear this beautiful shirt. It isn't appropriate for all occasions. For Hannah's birthday: yes. For Sunday Church: No, definitely not.

So I got to use a blow torch on Friday. In metal/jewelry class we were learning how anneal copper so that it was softer and easier to create texture on. It was so empowering. I want to use the blow torch for everything. EVERYTHING! I could walk around work with it and if the popper were to break I'd just bust it out and BOOM! Laura saves the day. They would call me "blow torch girl" or something more catchy. I would be loved by all.

Look at you all cute with that tattoo!

iTunes: "One" a cover by Aimee Mann
I am: Stuffed. Reminder to self: No more frosty-s with fries.

Every time I wear some sort of shirt that is a little low cut in the back someone mentions my tattoo which don't mind at all. Usually it's Kevin or James saying "OH MY GOD! WHAT IS THAT ON YOUR BACK?!!" To which I respond by turning with intense speed thinking that some grotesque insect is crawling up my spine. That joke never seems to get old with them. Today it was just Becca being her super nice self.

Becca: "Oooo I love your tattoo!"
Me: "Wa (distracted by the fact that someone's hand is now on my back poking at the fleshy area between my shoulder blades)."
Becca: "Oh I was just saying how much I like your tattoo!"
Me: "Thanks. I like it too."
Becca: "It's so beautiful!"
Me: "Yepper-o."
Becca: "No...it's really awesome."
Me: "Oh, I know."
::silence as she stares at my back::
Me: (jokingly) "I can give you the name of the guy who drew the design for me..."

She's been talking about getting one for a few months now but I just can't see her with a tattoo. Psh, no one guessed that I would get a tattoo.

Yesterday I went out and bought a Digital Voice Recorder since I have 4 lecture classes and do not have the ability to write faster then my professors can talk. It's pretty flippin' sweet.

Oh isn't it beautiful?! I have yet to figure out all it's functions but I'm pretty sure it's a combination Digital Voice Recorder and coffee maker--also makes Julienne fries. Will not break! ::taps it on table:: will not--::it falls apart::-it broke.

Now I'm off to finish spray painting an envelope. Don't ask.

Things I would do to get a NEW copy of Muse's Hullabaloo Soundtrack

• Eat only KFC for a whole month
• Watch Lindsay Lohan movies until my eyes bleed
• Make out with Rob Schneider
• Climb into an active Volcano
• Listen to Hillary Duff sing (nuff said)
• Sell my entire collection of Sandman graphic novels for a dollar
• Only see movies at the Campbell 16
• Stick my hand into boiling kettle cleaner
• lick barb wire
• Use my two least favorite words in a sentence every day of my life. I don't think it's necessary for me to state which words those are.
• Memorize the dictionary
• Consume cigarette ash
• Wear only yellow
• Tell Jake Lloyd he made Episode One a better movie
• Bathe in garbage juice for a week
• Buy tickets to and attend a Britney Spears concert
• Dye my hair 7 shades of green
• Shop at Hollister for the rest of my life
• drink 12 cups of pure Mt. Dew syrup
• Stop obsessing over Ryan Reynolds

---

iTunes: "Feeling Good" by Muse and "Sitting, waiting, wishing" by Jack Johnson

I am: chafed/vexed

Anyway so the day was "chiz" until it was almost over then I got all pissed off and now I'm angry. Gr. Not even the thought of that attractive young man in my Art History Class can even bring a smile to my face. Like a normal human being I am going to suppress my rage until I explode like a cheap Toshiba TV.

So Hannah posted this dorky thing on her Xanga:

1. Reply with your name and I'll respond with something random about
you.

2. I'll tell you what song/movie reminds me of you.

3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in.

4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (maybe/maybe
not).

5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.

6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.

7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.

8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal

And because I cannot seem to find my own identity and because I need a distraction from my animosity, I too, am going to post such message on my web site but with minor modifications...

1. Reply with your name and I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll tell you what movie reminds me of you.
3. I'll pick a flavor of jello to wrestle with you in. Is it just me or does this sound dirty? Hannah, what were you thinking when you wrote these?
4. I'll say something that only makes sense to you and me (maybe/maybe not).
5. I'll tell you my first memory of you.
6. I'll tell you what song reminds me of you. (because animals are lame)
7. I'll ask you something that I've always wondered about you.
8. If I do this for you, you must post this on your journal. Ok, you don't really have to post this on your journal but if you don't man-eating squirrels will attack you and your family and I cannot be responsible for what become of them.

Now since Hannah kindly posted her comments on my Xanga I am going to answer her on my Blog:

Hannah

1. You are sooo much more Indie then I will ever be.

2. Gattaca. I think it's obvious why.

3. Sour Green Apple.

4. "I put anbesol on my lips and then they went numb for, like, hours!"

5. I know I have memories before this but I'd have to say that the first time would be at Natalie's house when the above quote was stated.

6. "Time is running out" by Muse because that is the first time you recommend a CD and I actually liked it.

7. "How is it that you make more money then me, work more hours then me, and yet are always broke?"

---

While on the somewhat topic of Muse, I have come to realize that if you are going to walk into a room, "Hysteria" or "Cave" should be playing in the background because it has to be the ultimate walking music. Someone should buy me a stereo that I can carry around so that I can fulfill my dream.

---

EDIT: One for the Nat-ster

1. There were a few times sophomore Year, I honestly thought you could totally take Tamila no matter what she said.

2. 10 Things I Hate About You. Shakespeare as a teen movie? COME ON! That just screams "Natalie"!

3. Black Cherry

4. "IT'S NOT PORN!"

5. Hmm let's see...I met you in..what like 7th grade? I know that I met you through Dani but I more remember you going around to the entire 8th grade class introducing everyone to Tamila like she was some kind of foreign exchange student. Ha-ha the best memory I have of you is at the huge party we had at your house when we all tried to fit into Sam's uber tiny sports car and Linzy or you said, "There's not even enough room to shag in it!" I believe we also broke the screen to the window at your room. Man, that was a good night.

6. "Who Will Save Your Soul" by Jewel. You are the ultimate Jewel fan. Sometimes I get you and Jewel mixed up and then I realized that your poetry is actually good.

7. "Do you fear anything? I mean seriously. Do you even have the ability to fear?"

---

EDIT: 8/26/05

SANDOR

1. Logan (fellow gamer friend of yours that is one of my employees) giggles every time your name is brought up and feels the need to inform me about Counter-Strike. He started calling you SAND-or and I told him not to but he keeps doing it. You should beat him up.
2. Lord of the Rings: FOTR that or Charlie's Angels. I remember you drooling over those stupid Cameron Diaz pins. Hehe, that movie was so lame.
3. Orange.
4. "Oh my gosh. You DO look like Velma!" I hate you for that.
5. It was the first time I was closing concession and you came back to check my work. You ran your hand across the counter and said that it was not clean enough and made me stay an extra 15 minutes to re-clean the counters. Gr.
6. I'm going to have to go with Switchfoot's "Meant To live". Whenever I get onto your web site I hear that song. That song is aweeeesome.
On a side note: I almost went with Cadet's "God-Man!" but it didn't quite fit you.
7. Who was your favorite employee when you worked at the 8? Was it Amanda? I bet it was. I hate you...

You know it's been a slow day at work when...

Nicole makes this face...


and when you force your employees to do backflips for you....

Birfday (yes, it's spelled correctly)

iTunes: "Papa was a rollin' stone" by The Temptations
I am: Not in the mood to work tomorrow

Oh man, Andrew's birthday celebration was a flippin' blast. I will have to tell this in part so for tonight...

PART 1 OF THE MOST AWESOME DAY EVER:

At 12:05pm it strikes me that I need to vandalize Andrew's car for his birthday. I make the decision that I have to go all out. To "the extreme" if you will. I send Logan (employee) to Party City with $20 out of my own wallet to buy 2 window chalk markers, 2 500 ft bundles of streamer, and as many boxes of saran wrap as possible. He returns. I decide that this must be done quick and with Logan's help. I grab him and another employee (Jessie, oh Jessie!) and we tell Becca that we will be going on an extended break. Jessie text messages Andre and finds out that he is in flippin' Nixa at Tanner's. A quick decision is made. We must drive out there so that we may trash his car. After driving all the way out there we are shocked to find out that he has left already. We grumble as we are forced to return to work. We revise our plan so that it will be after work that we attack. The time comes. Logan and I make our way to Andrew's apartment. There it is....his wonderful and clean Cavalier. It is 6:40pm and we are to meet at the Skating rink at 7pm so we don't have much time before he come out the door and sees us. I start writing random "birthday" messages while Logan takes a crack at covering everything with streamer and Saran wrap. At 6:50 we stop and run to his car. As we begin to move we gaze at the masterpiece that we created. Ah, orange and pink streamers covered in Saran wrap with hot pink writing on the windows (that is now smeared thanks to Logan). He drives across the street and we wait in a parking lot to watch. I call Daniel to get everyone to get out of the apartment so that Andrew will see. Oh the look on his face was precious. Then the group of people start point at Logan's car. Logan floors it in reverse and I ram into the back seat. We pass his house and head straight for the rink. It was greeeeat!

I want my message read clear

iTunes: "Capricorn (A Brand New Name)" by 30 Seconds to Mars
I am: Stoked

JARED LETO'S (Fight Club, Alexander, American Psycho, Requiem for a Dream, Panic Room, and the fabulously upcoming Lord of War) BAND IS THE MOST AWESOME BAND IN THE WORLD! You heard me right. Now buy their CD.

If for some strange reason I happen to run into Jared Leto on the street I just might just have to hug him and say, "Thank you Jared Leto for showing other actors that it is possible to make music that doesn't suck. Now can you please tell Will Smith to stop rapping?" Sure he'd think I was utterly insane and sure, he'd start to freak out when our little hug turns into a 40 minute squeeze fest but for those brief few moments that I would be touching Mr. Leto maybe, just maybe, some of his genius will rub off onto me and I too can create beautiful things like "30 Seconds to Mars." Granted he will be trying to pry me off with a crowbar because I will be attached to his t-shirt like a blood sucking leech, but hey, it'll be ok. He'll respect me for that.

By day he is just your average, every day good-looking actor trying to get by but by night he becomes...

JARED LETO!! ROCK STAR TO THE EXTREEEEM!

Now for those of you who love Chevelle, Breaking Benjamin, A Perfect Circle, Three Days Grace, or any band that sounds remotely like any of the above needs to come to me so that I can let you borrow this CD so that you too may bask in the genius that is Jared Leto.

Naw, it can't be heaven. There's not enough Twinkies.

I am: amnesici
Tunes: “At the Speed of a Yellow Bullet” by Head Automatica

Though Vicks 44 is coursing through my veins I am still able to pull myself off my couch and to my beautiful computer to post yet another pointlessly entertaining post. That is just how dedicated I am people.I was pretty down about the whole, being sick for the two days I actually have off work but Justin R. reminded me multiple times that, HEY, in a few weeks I’ll be enjoying one of my favorite bands…live…in my hometown. HAHA that reminds me! I have somehow managed to get Justin to drive us all to Lawrence, KS for the Jimmy Eat World show! Contrary to popular belief my feminine powers of persuasion are still effective!

So get this...I...could...be....in Stephen King's next book!! That's right! All I have to do is donate a bunch of money...a "butt-load" if you will...to a worth cause and BOOM! I'm instantly in the book! Ok, so maybe it doesn't work exactly like that but it's pretty close. I mean so what if my Grandmother intended me to use that money to pay for college. I think she would agree that being in STEPHEN KING's next book is much more important.

My Snapple Popsicle stick taught me today that “starfish are the only animal that can turn their stomach inside out.” You know I don’t think I would have maintained that A average in high school if these frozen dessert companies didn’t put essential facts, like this one, on their Popsicle sticks.

::cough cough:: ::sniff sniff::

iTunes: "Roxanne" by the Police

Looks like Laura's not going to make it to church tomorrow.

Hmm. Laura might not even make it out of bed tomorrow...

God-willing I will clear a path through all these Kleenexes!

Well, excuse me, Miss "I'm-so-smart-I-can't-wait-to-go-to-the-Island!"

I am: Still hacking up pieces of my lung
iTunes: "Got To Give it Up" by Marvin Gaye

I snagged this sweet baby from work on Saturday:

Oh Ewan. If only you weren't married and had a kid, I'd lust over you ten times more.

I also snagged a "final" of Waiting.

Yeah. I know what you're thinking. Look, one bad picture means nothing. Shhh. Just let the moment pass.

This morning was terrible. I had this awful dream in which I found myself in awkward position of being in the middle of the beautiful Canadian mountains with Jason Statham who was trying to car-jack me. Sadly things went from bad to worse when a struggle broke out between Ray Liotta (he was in the car with me? I apparently have guest stars in my dreams.) and Jason Statham resulting in a large avalanche. Now imagine my reaction when I woke up to find myself literally covered in, what must have been at least 1/2 a foot, of Kleenexes. Let's just say that, at 6am the entire house was awakened by the delightful sound of my wheezed screaming.

Think of what a duck with strep throat would sound like screaming. That was me around 6am.